Friday 18 January 2008
"we are the fall, from the depths of your monstrosity"
can you imagine what a wonderful place to live in the world would be if mark e smith narrated those m&s food adverts?
Saturday 12 January 2008
hands from the distant past
This morning in manchester, i finally visit the church of the holy name of jesus on oxford road, which i'd heard was spectacular and indeed was, even with unfortunate renovation work going on. The long line of students queuing for confession after a friday night was an amusing sight.]
Anyway the only reason i mention this is because in the church as in most churches there is of course a war memorial. Feeling my sense of duty to 'pay my respects', i head over and try to contemplate the nature of their ultimate sacrifice and all that stuff. Trouble is i've never really been able to do this. At moments such as this, and also during two minute silences etc, i've always found it very hard to focus. It's not due to an easily distracted mind or a lack of appreciation on my part, I just find it very difficult to think about things such as the wars. I have no experiences that could lead me to understand the times they went through, its just a huge, dark chasm of imcomprehensible sacrifice to me.
The way war memorials are never helps either. If it was a statue, or a painting, or a poem, i'd be able to get inspired. But the fact that its just a list of names, faceless and empty, means I have nothing to link me to the past. ANYWAY, just as I was thinking this and getting annoyed at myself for being so shit i scan down the names and see my own name. Shit scarey, and instantly locked me into the reality that of course as an 18 year old boy, i probably would have been drafted and sent off back then-it would have been me. An incredibly surreal moment, that shook me a fair bit and got me thinking about what it must have been like-at last.
Anyway the only reason i mention this is because in the church as in most churches there is of course a war memorial. Feeling my sense of duty to 'pay my respects', i head over and try to contemplate the nature of their ultimate sacrifice and all that stuff. Trouble is i've never really been able to do this. At moments such as this, and also during two minute silences etc, i've always found it very hard to focus. It's not due to an easily distracted mind or a lack of appreciation on my part, I just find it very difficult to think about things such as the wars. I have no experiences that could lead me to understand the times they went through, its just a huge, dark chasm of imcomprehensible sacrifice to me.
The way war memorials are never helps either. If it was a statue, or a painting, or a poem, i'd be able to get inspired. But the fact that its just a list of names, faceless and empty, means I have nothing to link me to the past. ANYWAY, just as I was thinking this and getting annoyed at myself for being so shit i scan down the names and see my own name. Shit scarey, and instantly locked me into the reality that of course as an 18 year old boy, i probably would have been drafted and sent off back then-it would have been me. An incredibly surreal moment, that shook me a fair bit and got me thinking about what it must have been like-at last.
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